Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Woman's Private Part

A friend of mine brought an article to my attention recently. It was an article written by Amara, a Nigerian woman, for African women in general and other Nigerian women in particular. The subject matter of that article was at once arresting, and I found that I couldn’t stop until I had read every word. It turned out that I pretty much already knew the stuff contained therein and I agreed with pretty much everything in it. I am using this opportunity to spread this educational write-up hoping that it might reach and positively impact as many as there are who might read it. At any rate, I will not be surprised if there are differences in opinion with the author of this piece.

I treated this topic sometime in 2009, after which I received endless comments and questions on sex and the woman’s body. The sad thing is that a good number of these comments are from the male folk; they are either talking about their girlfriend or their wives.

I believe that men don’t always like to discuss such issues and for a man to be the one worried about these problems, it is either of two things: the woman has refused to do something about it or the man is too timid to say it out.

I remember getting a message from a woman who was in pain and on the verge of losing her relationship due to this very problem. I gave my own solutions to it, but sadly I didn’t get any feedback from her.

From the numerous conferences I have held and from my counselling meetings with women, I have concluded that the major problems our women are faced with are Vaginal Odour and Slacked Vaginal Muscles. I will start with the problem of vaginal muscles.

It is a natural thing for a woman to lose her vaginal muscles at a certain stage of her life. But there are cases where we have young and vibrant women having weak vaginal muscles. This is a very serious issue that calls for concern.

I am not a medical doctor, but from my meetings with people and secret interviews with girls who are faced with this problem, this is caused by some reasons:

Lack of vaginal exercise

Inactive lifestyle


Like I said last week, a lady who was in a relationship with a former VP of Nigeria confessed to this. She spent her life allowing such a dirty man to have sex with her from the anus. Any man who finds pleasure in veering off the natural path and wants to enjoy himself through a woman’s anus is devilish and dirty.

This lady now lives in pain as even the money she made from this evil man cannot help her out. She has gone through series of surgeries and now her pride is gone and every young man who loves her look and wants to get into something serious with her runs away the moment he sleeps with her.

Talking about inactive lifestyle, I see women destroying their lives simply because the money is there. These ones sit in front of the television watching Africa Magic from morning till night. When you don’t move your body the way you should, your muscles slack with time.

There is a particular exercise for the vaginals called the Kegel exercise. If you are one of those who believe exercise is just for weight loss, you are wrong. Exercise does a lot when it comes to your sex life. The best exercise to improve sex is the Kegel squeeze-basically strength training for your PC muscles which hold up your vagina, uterus, anus, bladder, and urethra. The stronger the muscles are, the more intense your orgasms will be.

Many people talk about Kegel without even knowing what it is, and this makes them do it the wrong way. Some women squeeze their pelvic area while standing or sitting believing that is Kegel. It is a part of it, but definitely not all of it. To do Kegel the right way, try stopping the urine flow when you pee. Hold the squeeze for five seconds, then release. Continue with your other forms of pelvic squeezes while you cook, stand, and sit.

Doing fifty to hundred Kegel squeezes thrice weekly will help keep those muscles in good shape. Don’t make this a daily habit as it could lead to urinary tract and bladder infections.

To take care of your vaginals, I am sure you will find the following tips helpful:

Choice of underwears:

That a particular under wear is beautiful doesn’t make it good for you. Avoid panties made from synthetic as these inhibit the free flow of air around the vaginal area, creating the ideal damp, warm condition for bacterial growth.

Cotton is by far the best fabric to wear and if you enjoy wearing silky underwear save it for occasional rather than everyday use. Also avoid the regular wearing of tight fitting trousers, girdle, and panty hose.

Poor Hygiene:

Another thing that makes you have vaginal odour and infections is poor hygiene. I see women go to bed without having a night bath. What on earth will make a woman go to bed without properly cleaning up? I see celebrities and young girls publicly confess to this. They talk and care about their face more than their private part.

You go to the bathroom just to wash off make-up and apply your night cream, but you are too tired to get into the bath and wash properly. We see your beautiful and groomed face, but your man sees the private area and that is what pushes him away and makes him lose interest in love making. Smelling good outside doesn’t mean neatness inside.

I keep saying this, that we pray unnecessary prayers most times. We keep disturbing God when we should be doing something reasonable to help ourselves. This is why I always tell our Pastors and Imams to tell us the truth. A woman comes to you for prayers against her husband’s girlfriend and for her husband to return home.

You know her look and carriage are part of the problem. You have never seen her house properly arranged. If you really care about her, you should please tell her to go do something about her looks because you can’t help wondering what some women look like down there just by the condition of their hair and body.


It would do you a lot of good if you can stay off those douching products in the market. Douching happens to be one of the major causes of vaginal itching. Your vagina doesn’t require excessive cleansing. Repetitive douching disrupts the normal organisms in the vagina and can actually increase the risk of vaginal infection. Drop that mentality which makes you believe that douching helps clear up vaginal infections.

Scented and Harsh Soaps:

Avoid those scented or harsh soaps such as those with deodorants and anti bacterial action. There are several ranges of feminine wash in the market and they are soap free and gentle for your vagina. There are very common ones like Sebamed, Femfresh, Summers Eve, Beauty Formula. It is very sad that women who should know better are the most guilty of this. Please avoid using Lactacid in your vaginal area.

Also avoid scented tampons and sanitary pads. I know you want to use spray all over your body to impress the guy, but please keep it away from your vaginals. If you wash and keep your vaginals in good state, there won’t be need for anything artificial as that takes away the natural, God-given smell.

Coloured toilet paper and bubble bath should also be avoided. White toilet tissue is the best for you. I know you enjoy having a bubble bath, but it could be one of the reasons for your constant application of Canesten. I can authoritatively tell you that if you live a very healthy lifestyle and use the right products, you won’t need Canesten and those antibiotics that weaken your immune system.

Public Toilet:

Reduce and if possible, stop the use of public toilets. I have maintained that as a policy to stay away from public toilets and if I go into someone’s house, I must check out your environment before deciding on what next to do.

Too much of fried and spicy foods are not good for your vaginals. Also make it a habit to take yogurt regularly. If you have the problem of this foul odour emanating from the vaginal area each time your man sleeps with you, you really have to do something before it wrecks your relationship.

Learn to wash your vagina well with tepid water using feminine wash. Insert your finger properly into your vagina and clean up. This is all you need to keep clean. Some ladies, especially young girls, use alum and other very harsh products for cleansing; please put an end to this.

Eat the right foods with enough fruits and vegetables. Take your milk and yogurt regularly. If you have the itching, try applying fresh, natural yoghurt to your vagina like thrice daily. Keep your vaginal skin dry always.

Sex is very necessary for a good love life with your spouse. Vaginal odour is there to stop your happiness and you must deal with it before it deals with you. If you have this problem of vaginal odour and constant itching, no amount of prayer can help you. Please help yourself by doing something to enable the man breathe effectively during love-making.

Please, ladies what are you thoughts and feelings on this article? Do you agree with it? Do you disagree on some issues--what would those points be? Do you have other suggestions you want to add?


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  1. I 100% agree with everything this woman has written in her article and the problem lies with African parents finding it uncomfortable to tell their children about these things...some of these things that has been mentioned in this article, i didnt know about them up until maybe last year and this was through conversations with some ladies in the chat room or conversations with my white friends. Many women are not aware of this issue especially the ones who should know.

  2. I totally agree with this article,gosh this is something every woman should know about. not just african women. i believe she is using african women as ann example because as african women our mothers or grandmothers didn't know about this things and so they never took the time to teach us these things. All i ever remember my grandmother telling me was don't forget to wash down there. i was always wondering why but i guess that was her way of teaching me about keeping my "goodies" clean. But most of what this article is talking about is not new to me, coming of age in America i have learned alot about how to take care of that department. reading this article i have actually learned something. i am aware that the vagina loses its elasticity due to certain conditions or lifestyle, but i never knew there was a certain exercise to tighten it back up. well you learn something new everyday. i love this topic, i like explaining this to the other girls in the room, i think sometime am just too "blunt" about,, but hey they need to learn about these thing. I would hate for the relationships to come to an end because their boyfriend thinks she has a "stinky vagina". So my females out there, try to educate yourself about what goes on down there in the "va-jay-jay department".

  3. Interesting perspective Taee. I wonder why parents find it hard to teach their daughters these things. Could it be because they do not know these things either? Which point would you say that most Nigerian women may not know (may be guilty of)?

  4. LOL.. now tell me why I am laughing while reading this. Ok, do you agree with the Kegel exercises she suggested knowing that holding back pee for instance may cause UTIs?

  5. Wow! this a very very interesting and sad article to read about Nigerian woman dont know how to take care of their bodies. This doesnt make sense to me, how a woman spends so much time in the bathroom to do make up but cant spend that same amount of time to get inside of their bodies clean. The Kegal exercises I didnt know that was an actual exercise but I can say that I do hold my pee sometimes and then release it. But I hold that this article will educate more Nigerian woman on how to take care more their inside bodies than their outside or at least take care of both inside and outside of the body at the same time... smh

  6. Yeah well, I wouldn't want it to sound like we are picking on Nigerian women in particular--cos I am sure there are many Nigerian women who look after themselves properly. Like Sia pointed out, these words should be directed to women in general because there are many who would benefit from these recommendations regardless of their country of residence.

  7. I'm glad sexual information is becoming more accessible in our austere Nigerian community. However, I do hope availability also results in application.

    Thank you.

  8. Well yes it is down to the fact that they dont know about these things but then again, like Sia pointed out, my mum always told me to wash my treasure clean too and i thank God i followed that...but then over the years I realised through research an talking to other females that some of these soaps we use to clean our treasures are in fact harmful. Now with the whole douching thing, I didn't even know it could mess up down there until I actually took the time to read about what douching exactly does and how it works. I guess its down to this generation of Nigerian women to educate our children and spread the knowledge to.

  9. I might be naive about having experienced this happening but my little knowledge of foul breathe puts the scenario into perspective for me. I am always very conscious of people (both male n female) with this problem and most times would try to keep my distance when they open their mouth to speak. I therefore can't imagine a foul odour coming during intimacy...serious turn off. While it is sad that men are the ones coming out to champion this anomaly, the women folks ought to set aside any shame ascribed and deal with the issue with the urgency it deserves. The days of issues like these being treated as a taboo is over. Nicely written article.

  10. This is super informative. I do not actually know much about vaginal upkeep, but I guess it’s not too late to start. I never had a problem with vaginal smell, at least not to the extent that I was worried. But I thought the vagina was supposed to smell. I guess I am wrong. I would never have known any of this if not for Sia. And even with Sia’s help, I am still lost. So it’s good that there is an article I could look at to guide me.
    I really do think vaginal health should be taught in schools just as much as sex education and menstruation. I probably believe it is not a topic in our community in order to deter promiscuity. This is because if your coochie is clean and tight, of course you would love to flaunt it. Lol!
    I really thank you for this article though. It is a much needed wake up call. Just because the floor looks study doesn’t mean we should ignore the creaks.

  11. Molade, but are there points you disagree with? I guess I am wondering if there are any points that people do not completely agree with.

  12. Godfather, i do not have enought knowledge on the issue to disagree with anything. thats the problem right there, my lack of knowledge. and that is the real issue. but if i would have to choose a point to challenge, it is that an inactive lifestyle slacks vaginal muscles. doesn't sound plausible. but then again, what do i know?

  13. I Totally Agree

    Not everyone has someone to teach them on how to take care of our area this article is really helpful cause somethings on here i didn't know was bad and not healthy i do only one thing on here which is douching but only after I'm done with my period....and yes i have also heard the alum helps to tighten the area but i don't have a problem there so i don't bother about that but all in all this article is very helpful and i need to be coming back here to learn a few things and i know i will be carrying one lesson from the article right now and that would be the KEGEL exercise i didn't even know that was an exercise and i find myself doing that sometimes lol thank you Godfather

  14. Irenylicioux4/22/2011 4:13 AM

    I encourage all ladies both single and married to read this article...yeah its long...but i can guarantee u that u will neva get bored reading it...So read n get enlightened.

    @Mollypie...U re not wrong the Vagina has its own natural odour or rather perfume which is ok...but when it's unclean the odour becomes strong and dat's rlly bad for ladies.

    Well...as we all kw the vagina is designed to clean itself...so plz dont insert ur finger inside like the writer said cos the inner vagina is soft n u can injure it in the process of inserting ur fingers inside...but u must alwaz kip the outer vagina clean cos that's the part that accumulates dirts (by dirts i mean those whitish discharge that becomes brownish).Wet issues are advisable for wipping the V cos they clean it better than dry issues.
    If u are addicted to using tampoos...alwaz mk sure ur hands are clean b4 inserting the tampoo.
    Thx y'all...cheers

  15. So it’s been a while since i was back to this blog to see the comments about this particular article. i am glad to see a lot of us commenting about it. i was hoping to see most of the females should have read it and posted comments. Anyway i just wanted to add a few more info to this article about keeping your "va-jay-jay" area healthy. These are thing i myself practice to the best of my ability. Ladies if we can spend 2hrs doing make-up and our hair, why can't we spend even a few min trying to take care of our most important asset? So here are few steps to keeping your vagina healthy:

    1. Keep healthy: This may seem like a no brainer -- keep healthy to keep a healthy vagina. For this you need to minimize sugar intake, and maximize yogurt intake. Why yogurt? Simple, really. Ladies yogurt is your best friend, not just any type of yogurt. Plain yogurt from the regular super market will do. The bacteria in your vagina are a certain type that is in only a couple of foods that you can find in the grocery store. It just so happens, though, that yogurt contains good bacteria called acidophilus. Sugar, meanwhile, promotes the type of bacteria that the yogurt bacterias, if you will, try to kill off. So, as said before, minimize sugar, and maximize yogurt, sugar-free preferably.

    2. Keep yourself clean: A large cause of infections happen simply because sweat or oils built up until there was nothing for it to do except fester and form an infection. Never fun. So bath and shower regularly, and try and keep "down there" as clean as possible, without using a douche. Douches clean too much-- they take away some of the bad bacteria, but then they also take away massive amounts of the good bacteria. Unfortunately, the bad bacteria build itself up, and you're worse off than before. Douching can also lead to increased inflammation (vaginitis). A simple washcloth, with a small amount of mild unscented soap and water works fine, but do not wash inside. The vagina is constantly flushing itself. So allow it to work the way it was designed.

    3. Use condoms! Condoms, while helping to protect you against pregnancy, also help keep your vagina clean. Having unprotected sex often can lead to vagina problems as well as the obvious pregnancy and STDs.

    4. Wear cotton underwear: Cotton is very breathable, if you will, and allows the vagina to get air circulating around it. This helps to keep things from building up "down there", and also helps maintain good skin around the vagina area.

    5. Take out your old tampons: Leaving a tampon in your vagina too long, more than six hours, is a very bad idea. It can cause a toxic syndrome (TSS), as well as some very disgusting build up. Use smaller size and change sooner. Changing out pads often is also a good idea-- leaving a pad on too long can cause serious irritation to the skin on and around the vagina like diaper rash! So keep the diaper rash at bay, and change your pad throughout the day.

    6. Avoid sprays and scented soaps: Actually, try and avoid soaps "down there" as much as possible. They can get caught in the crevices of the vagina and fester. And you have an infection of the vagina in no time at all. Sprays and scented soaps, though, are more damaging, as they are designed to leave a bit behind-- the scent, and you don't want anything left on the skin of your vagina at all. Soaps and bubble baths can also worsen vaginal dryness.

    7. Visit your gynecologist regularly: Only your doctor can accurately diagnose any problems you may be having. If you do suspect anything at all, call and make an appointment as soon as you can.

    8. Rinse Well: While showering or taking a bath, rinse your vagina with lots of water, especially if you use soap.

  16. Its an interstin talks,well i will advice all my fans over d world dat dey should always go to d hospital4checkupe.g vagina text is important,becos health is wealth&pls lets join our hands to eradicate dis spread of hiv&aids.luv u all.

  17. molade am honestly behind u,u hv written it all,and to the writer thanks..........