Thursday, November 11, 2010

Stephanie and Josh: Love's Growing Pains

Life is not always a bed of roses”….. “Despite our best laid plans, things always happen to throw our lives into a tailspin”…... “It is better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all”. These and many more thoughts raced through Stephanie’s mind as she lay on her bed wondering her next course of action.

Five years ago, in New York City, Stephanie was dating a tall, handsome and laid back guy called Josh. Stephanie was 22 years old—vivacious, bubbly and eager to experience more of life. She was attractive by NYC standards; she had an amazing sense of fashion. She was also very kind and generous especially to people in need.  She was one of those people who loved to be the life of a party.

It was therefore very odd how she got romantically involved with Josh. One day she was walking through the aisle of a grocery store when she saw this tall, handsome but passive man approaching in the opposite direction. Their eyes met briefly and they continued past each other till they got to the end of the aisle. As they tried to turn the corner, they stole glances at each other again and their eyes locked again. Obviously, there was some physical attraction between them. They started walking to different parts of the store. Unfortunately the fire had been lit. Josh fumbled around for a crate of eggs and a gallon of milk. After a while, he started tracing his way to Stephanie’s direction. At last he came very close to her and pretended to be examining the different cereal boxes sitting on the shelves. This, he did, as he sought an opening line.

Josh, 26 years old, was a very laid back and self-effacing character. Despite his imposing physical attributes—his height and his looks—he was the sort of old-fashioned gentleman one might read about in books. Josh was from a little town in Indiana and had just come on a visit to his sister in the Big City. This explains why he still had what one might sneeringly call his small-town values. Unlike the alpha males that run around in the big cities who seemingly have no problems talking to and wooing women, Josh was rather respectful of ladies to the point of shyness. If it were just about a show of brute strength, Josh would easily prevail but when it came to the issue of women, he was still one to open doors for a woman, help a lady carry heavy groceries to her car or just address a girl as “ma’am” until they were on a first name basis. Stephanie was the exact behavioral opposite.

Stephanie must have sensed Josh’s quandary. After what seemed like an eternity of suspense, Stephanie turned around and faced him.

“You are not from around here, right?” She asked curiously.

“No ma’am. How could you tell when I have not even said anything yet?” he asked.

“Well, I know this neighborhood very well. Besides, something about you is different. My name is Stephanie” She replied

“Thanks. The name’s Josh. I am just visiting my sister from Indiana” Josh volunteered.

“Oh my God. I am from Indiana as well! I have been here in NYC for a long time though. Someday I’ll be back . What a coincidence!” She exclaimed.

From there, they chatted animatedly till they paid for their groceries and left the store. They eventually hooked up and began to see each other. There was something about the earnestness with which these two souls pursued their relationship for the three weeks that Josh stayed in NYC. They seemed to complement each other perfectly.  It was with a bit of sadness that Stephanie eventually had to say goodbye to Josh when he left for home. They promised to keep in touch with each other.

After 2 months of their long distance relationship, Stephanie began to show signs of frustration. She was no longer just content with the long and passionate phone calls they shared, or the countless hours they spent together on the internet messenger. She yearned for his touch; she wanted to go out on dinner dates or to the theatre or to concerts with her boyfriend by her side. She wanted to show him off to her friends; she wanted to have all the ‘fun’ people usually have in serious committed relationships.

When she expressed her angst to Josh, he suggested that she could move back to Indiana so that they can be together. Stephanie was devastated by what she considered to be Josh’s reckless answer because she had expected that Josh would try to abandon his life to come and be with her in New York. Besides, Stephanie never wanted to leave NYC for a number of reasons; chief amongst which was the active dating scene. She wanted to have a full social life and to keep her options open because of the vast number of potential love interests in a big city like New York. She was completing her studies in Business Administration as well, and what better city than New York was there for her to seek employment in?

So she went ahead and broke up with Josh and forgot all about him. Years passed—Five years to be exact.

In five years, Stephanie had grown a lot wiser. She got a great job after school and was financially buoyant. Her romantic life was however in shambles. To make matters worse, her company started downsizing because the economy had gotten very bad. She was offered a position with slightly less pay at the company’s Indiana office or given the option of tendering her quit notice. Many of her colleagues were not so fortunate as they were unceremoniously let go. After long deliberations, she decided to continue working for the company at their Indiana office. In no time at all, Stephanie left behind the beautiful city she had grown to love (and now to hate) and moved back to her hometown.

At this point it is necessary to recount all the woes that Stephanie suffered at the hands of the smooth city slickers she dated in New York. She was fatally attracted to the dashing, smooth-talking alpha males that were simply out for an adventure. She loved the posh cars, the free flowing drinks, the dancing and grooving in swanky clubs, the endless parties—all the unmistakable attributes of the New York night scene. She was a social butterfly. Nevertheless she was never truly lucky with men, love or relationships.

One by one, she dumped or was dumped by the men she met. One was dumped for deceiving her into his bed when he already had a wife, a girlfriend and a child; another dumped her for another gorgeous St Lucian who might have been a model of some sort; another still dumped her because he claimed she was just too bossy; she dumped yet another when she discovered that the guy was bisexual; she dumped another man whom she called a witless workaholic; and on and on and on. In the end, she became very disillusioned about men in general and began to seriously question whether she was ever meant to find true love.

It was with her sad history of failed relationships that she came back to Indiana to start another chapter of her life. She remembered Josh and the careless, mean manner with which she broke off their relationship five years ago. She wondered what Josh might be like now and whether he was seeing someone now. To say that Stephanie seriously regretted the way she treated Josh is to say it lightly. In five years, and having dated as many men as she did, she had come to regret bitterly her unwise choice. If she could turn back the hands of time, she would never have treated Josh the way she did. For many weeks since she came back to Indiana, she tossed and turned around on her bed each night restlessly wondering what she should do.

At long last, she did some private investigations and discovered that Josh was still in Indiana and very much single. She even managed to get his phone number. On many nights, she would pick up the phone to give him a surprise call: her courage would fail her and she would drop the receiver.

Stephanie was still attractive. If anything, she had more to offer a man now. She had her gorgeous looks, a great career, rare and uncommon street smarts, a radiant personality and above all, humility and modesty which come from having experienced the harsh and painful lashings of Life’s lessons. She was no longer the thrill-seeking 22 year old of yesteryears. But she was still very indecisive concerning her past flame.  What should she do? Should she call him? If yes, what would she say when she calls him? Should she send him an email telling him that she is now closer to him? Should she just pop up at his house to see whether he’d be excited that she was back in town? Or maybe show up at his workplace thus being a welcome distraction in an otherwise busy and stressful work day? Should she just count her losses and move on? Should she just call him, monitor his vocal inflections on the phone and possibly save herself the embarrassment of an awkward physical meeting if he sounded like he was still bitter over the past? What on earth should she do?

Life is not always a bed of roses” she mused once again.

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  1. hey gee_eff :P
    i sooo identify with Stephanie. she sounds just like me and made the same mistake i would have made. hopefully josh still wants to be with that dumb girl. sometimes we cant help but be foolish because we do not know better. i think stephanie needed this experience to mold her. go steph and josh!

  2. PrincessJuubs11/11/2010 6:48 PM

    Awesome awesome first blog godfather, I can totally relate to this blog..... 'Mr Perfectionist' has done a wonderful job on this blog... This blog can relate to anyone's life that has gone through this similar situation... kisses and muahhhhhh :)

  3. Well, well, well....such a familiar story. I always love that line...."Its just something different about you". I get that a lot, but what I don't get is how do we know if meeting that "different" person is for a week, a year, or for a lifetime. I do believe everyone we meet has a purpose. Stephanie knows what she needs, but goes after what she wants. Needs never do fulfill that inner drive, we take for granted needs will always be there. I hope that is the case for Stephanie. Josh , the brand new Toyota in the middle of a BMW showroom. <>

  4. I found this short story easy to read and it flowed nicely. I like the enigmatic ending. Definitely leaves you wondering. Bravo!

  5. Hey, Godfather,
    That was a interesting blog. I feel bad for Josh and want to slap Stephanie across the face. Life isn't all about dating yahhh know?!?!?!? She shouldn't even bother trying to go back to Josh and Josh shouldn't take her back either. Its good Stephanie and Josh broke up because staying in NY and going through all that she did taught her a lesson on men and overall life. Happiness doesn't always come in the biggest, most expensive, coolest or funnest things. Sometimes it comes from that little place we all call home.

  6. I truly love the story line, i had a friend like that, hers end up well, so i hope steph's ends up well also. gf, nawaooo never knew you have such imagination. after i read this i was like wow, this could be a good novel to read on a rainy day, something to cuddle up with, and travel to a dream land. Its so intriguing, i wanted more. I frantically searched through your blog for i empathize with steph, but if he was meant for her, they would meet again. gf, keep it coming....

  7. Don't know why it took me this long to make a comment on this story. I for one believe as females we all have to go through life's twist and turns before actually seeing what's in front of our faces. Just like Stephanie, we tend to look for that one thing that we shall never be able to find, at the end of the day we end up losing all that we hold dear. As the saying goes "you never know what you had, till you loss it". Godfather, i will just like to say this was a great story, i can mostly relate to this young lady's plight. I sometime tend to think having a good career and a thriving social life is all there is to life. Love is an illusion in my eyes, its a thing of myth. I long for the day when i have to go searching for my Josh and create a happy ever-after ending of my own. Keep up the good work i wish there was a squeal, i like happy endings. Keep on writing brother!!!!!!!

  8. Nice work. For the mere fact that Josh is still single and still in town, I think it is just a sign that they might be destined to be together. C'mon, ponder this with me:: Stephanie miraculously got relocated; Josh is still single; Josh still retained his contacts after many years (some people may just change their contacts). I mean the list goes on and on.

    To summarize the aforementioned, I strongly believe they were meant for each other so Stephanie should give him a call.

  9. Guten tag!

    I really love this blog and im curious to find out what will happen...Will Stephanie find the courage to contact Josh?? Will Josh forgive her?? Will they continue their relationship or remain friends?? Josh seems like the forgiving type and i truly believe that fate has brought them back to the same state. We are human and it is in our nature to make mistakes but then it is what we do with those mistakes that we wallow in self-pity or pick our selves up and improve?

    Godfather you have done a fantastic job and I'm now looking forward to reading many more blogs from you :=)

  10. Ahh so you finally admit that you can write such interesting stories. Kudos.
    Never passed through such so lemme see if I can say something about it, Stephanie didn't need to go through all that at first, she should have been wiser but these days the word 'livin' life' is all about what Steph did b4 she realized she regretted all that. All d same, I'll say "Que Sera Sera". Let nature take its course with Josh, I don't know how he feels but I hope he has a change of heart and gives her a second chance.

  11. Hmmmm the first time i read this, i loved it. I'm still waiting on the ending. Godfather, you've done a good job on this one. I couldn't expect less of you. French people will say " Coup de chapeau, Bravo!!!" meaning Taking my hat off, Congrats ;-)

  12. I like how we all seem to be able to relate to this story. Also how its a simple read. The events in the seems to be really "convenient" though.
    BTW, i would have done thesame thing Stephanie did. I too, would have let the dude go. She really shouldnt regret her choice because when you have are with someone who wants you to relocate yet they arent interested in relocating, it makes you realize that all the person is interested in, is their best interest, regardless if it is compatible with yours or not.
    Not to say Steph wasnt being selfish too, its obvious that she was.
    ....or maybe they were both just being smart. Time is an element in the whole situation. They had not dated long enough to care enough to want to move to be closer to each other.

    Nice read. Looking forward to an update.

  13. Is love a fairy tale or do we like in sport "grind it out"! Is it about two individual having to let go of certain things or about one party giving up his/her life for the other. If the economy gets better would Steph not find her way back to her first love - the city? Nice reading @GF, maybe if she can settle her indecisiveness it could be a great relationship afterall.

  14. OMG i love this story because i think its related with everybody no matter the circomstances , love, work, friendship or whatever sometimes we just doing stuff without even thinking we drop everything just like that and sometimes life just bring us back to that same point to makes us realise our mistake and we just sat there and thinking what if this....., what if that......and we just keep thinking and thinking on and on.....
    thank u GODFATHER that was greAT.... love it

  15. "wow..!, G.f,nice story .i really enjoyed it and hope that the girl and the boy will meet their better half and if it's for two of them to stay together .best luck's.Godfather its a great work dear.i lov'em...! :*

  16. Thanks Lulu. Oh, the blog is still very new. If you do a search, you will not get any results as of the moment. Based on the feedback I am getting, I think I'll tell the rest of this true-to-life story later on.

  17. OMG. Two beautiful ppl from the same land falling in love with themselves, and depart from each other for a good 5 years. I think is better that she emails him or calls him. You never know-- he might just 4give her. She is a grown up woman now with a good job. I think these 2 ppl have things in common. Godfather, u did a great work here, but it was alot to read. Keep up the good work gf... muahhhhh!

  18. HEY!! Stephanie, u're definitely more than friends. Call him,Make plans,see him again if u want to... I know this whole thing is scary,yo stress seems to be bout managing expectations, fear of rejection, & becomin a burden.... but he has to give u every indication that hanging out wldn't be an inconvenience...

  19. Wow what a nice story.. I didn't want it to end..... But It did and I must say you did a very good job here.
    I think Stephanie should call him up. Because for Josh to be single after 5 years, that's luck on her side and she would be an Imbecile if she messes up her second chance of happiness.

  20. What a great story life is all about experience there is no manual on dating or holding on to a relationship its all trials and errors in this situation Stephanie had weighed her option and realize what she had with josh was special and just couldn't let go more so i am sure josh was feeling the same way she's feeling to me i think their heart is just two heart that beats as one no matter what, they will end up together because the way the story started and toward the end i think they are destined to be 2gether well i hope she takes up the courage to call him b4 is too late. Time waits for no one this is her second chance which must not be blown. godfather thanks for the great story keep it coming.

  21. so good,,just wished i could read on to knw ,,, if she later summoned d courage to call him and if dey finally re-united..nice write up,,

  22. Wow! Nice one GF... This is so good. Sometimes we make silly mistakes and it might not be reversible. I hope Stephanie gets her honey back.
    Lesson learned (Think about your decisions and be wise about them)

  23. This is really interesting. It’s quite relate-able, some of the things that Stephenie went through, sum of the people i've known i've gone through it also, which makes this story very interesting. Relationships sometimes can’t handle everything, especially if it is long distance. I definitely think she should call him. i can’t wait to read next part. This is really wonderful gf…keep on the good job. Maybe you could turn it into a short story one day?